tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5312535828395492202.post1723608589527251324..comments2022-10-24T05:29:20.929-04:00Comments on The Arbor Hospice Blog: How Do We Begin Conversations About The Care We Want At The End of Life?Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08831402627111927291noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5312535828395492202.post-42094423581763988202014-01-27T09:13:03.581-05:002014-01-27T09:13:03.581-05:00Hi Pat, Thank you so much for sharing your blog po...Hi Pat, Thank you so much for sharing your blog posts! It's great to know that what we are posting is useful. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08831402627111927291noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5312535828395492202.post-16378894022732769942014-01-21T21:05:52.894-05:002014-01-21T21:05:52.894-05:00As a retired school social worker I have been shar...As a retired school social worker I have been sharing these insightful and informative blogs with family, friends and colleagues. Some are in the medical professions, one is a geriatric social worker, but regardless of position all are caring beings who, in turn, are utilizing the ideas , concepts and supportive sharing. An outstanding resource for all. Thank you!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00514891218027957121noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5312535828395492202.post-58520228703014677622014-01-21T15:06:39.405-05:002014-01-21T15:06:39.405-05:00Thanks, Mike, for sharing your story with others w...Thanks, Mike, for sharing your story with others who may find encouragement in it to do the same with their loved ones.Dennis Sparkshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17192834950237470021noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5312535828395492202.post-91852793332093527172014-01-21T15:03:13.349-05:002014-01-21T15:03:13.349-05:00What a great way to spread the word about this imp...What a great way to spread the word about this important subject, Lorri, and I'm pleased that this post introduced you to a new resource (I just learned about it recently myself).Dennis Sparkshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17192834950237470021noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5312535828395492202.post-48082063722760691262014-01-21T13:31:33.984-05:002014-01-21T13:31:33.984-05:00“Everybody has got to die, but I have always belie...“Everybody has got to die, but I have always believed an exception would be made in my case.” <br />― William Saroyan<br /><br />I use the William Saroyan quote whenever the subject of death comes up. Of course, I didn’t believe it, but I’ve lived my life as though it were true. I think most of us do. But with advancing years, open heart surgery scheduled, and recovering from recent bladder cancer surgery, plus the gentle urging of Hospice volunteer and friend, Dennis Sparks, I knew I had to face reality. Death takes us all.<br /><br />So over the holiday break, when my daughter and son and their families were here, I told them of my wishes for my death. I’d read Five Wishes, have written advanced directives, have my affairs in order, and generally feel satisfied that I’d completed everything but THE TALK. I know of families torn apart from misunderstandings over care of a loved one, of people hooked up to medication, but who are unresponsive, or people who are kept alive by all means no matter how cruel.<br /><br />In the hubbub of family gatherings, I wanted my wife, son, and daughter together and without interruption. I didn’t mind if my son or daughter’s spouse was present. I told each that I wanted to see them the next day. They didn’t know what the topic was, specifically, but they knew I thought it important. I reminded them later of our appointment. When everyone was available, I asked them to meet with me in a bedroom of our condo. I explained the reason for the meeting, that I didn’t want any misunderstandings over my death, that my wife understood what I wanted, that, while I would prefer cremation or my body donated to a hospital, that I believed it was for the living to decide. I said that I didn’t want to suffer in a losing battle against death.<br /><br />I said all that and more. My daughter teared up immediately. My son looked stunned. They asked questions and assured me that I still had a long life ahead. When we finished talking I said that I had no plans to die, and I referred to the Saroyan quote. Everyone laughed and hugged. We talked some more about what I’d said and took a few minutes to recover and to rejoin the rest of the family.<br /><br />I felt that I’d completed my end-of-life care arrangements. There should be no misunderstandings.<br /><br /><br />Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08972137120447925481noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5312535828395492202.post-78189761608856138922014-01-21T12:58:00.553-05:002014-01-21T12:58:00.553-05:00Thanks, Dennis. I did not know this existed. I thi...Thanks, Dennis. I did not know this existed. I think I might give a speech at Toastmasters about hospice, and this would be a good resource to offer people. Lorri Coburnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16132809812921755957noreply@blogger.com